Asking somebody out is one of the most difficult things a guy will ever do.  Logically its a win-win situation where you like a girl and you want to ask her out.  If she turns you down, your mind is at rest and you can go back to getting some sleep.  If she says yes, you get to meet her and maybe take the first steps in a fulfilling relationship.  

But this is not a scenario that can be rationalised.  There is the eternal fear that something will go terribly wrong when you are talking to her on the phone. Like maybe you will forget how to speak and have to hang up in the middle of her saying "hello?  are you still there?". Impossible I hear you say, but it has been known to happen.  The trauma is so great that it can take days for the voice to return and it is best to stay in a dark room in the meantime in case you suffer further mental torture when somebody speaks to you and you look at them wide-eyed and unable to answer.

The problem starts through lack of preparation.  The guy's courage has reached critical mass and he gets on the phone in a rush of blood to the head.  Yeah he's going to ask her out, "hi would you like to go to dinner" wait for a single syllable response and hang up.  Thats all there is to it. But this isn't what happens.  You ring up and you get from reception to her in a stunning 5 microseconds.  Shit, better say something.  You introduce yourself, then you think she probably doesn't remember me so you explain where you met.  "Oh yes, the guy in the funny shirt" she replies whipping your confidence in your fashion sense out from under your dubarry clad feet in an instant.  You are still in the ask-her-out-to-dinner mode and are about to pop the question when she says "So, any craic?".  Core dump.  This is an illegal instruction that shatters your brain, already over clocked by your thumping heart.  What the hell did you do all last week? You give a reflex answer.  "Well, you know me, no craic really".  Firstly, she doesn't know you.  How could she.  Secondly, this was not a cool thing to say - who wants to go to dinner with a guy that is no craic.  Funnily enough, if this was one of the lads asking me this on the phone, I would say something witty like "no, fresh out" ( as if he was asking for crack, the drug, you see ).  At this stage, when you realise how stupid you must have sounded, you go into a minor coma, where you can hear only every second or third word she says, still hell bent on asking the question and trying to make cool responses to half heard questions. 

Then there is a minor pause in the conversation, ( well actually she might only be taking a breath mid-sentence rather than waiting for you to speak, but you can't hear her anyway so how are you supposed to know) , and you ask her out.  You can hear your words echo on the other end and you wait, mouth open, as if preparing to swallow the phone.  Eventually she replies and you know your destiny.  Either you are staying in squeezing spots all night, or you are squeezing spots all night so you can go out.  Hope its the latter, coz all this angst is sure to make you hungry.